Coping with Grief

Grieving is a part of life. It is a necessary process to go through while someone dear has left us behind.

When death took away someone dear, you probably may have a mixed feelings of:

Shock
Confusion
Denial
( You may tell yourself, "It's not true. This can't be happening!")
Anger
Sadness
Guilt
Hopelessness

It is perfectly normal for you to mourn and cry. You may feel depress for a while. You can seek out for some caring friends, who could understand your feelings of loss and share your pain. Expressing your feelings to others would also help you to overcome the grieving process.

Look for professional help when necessary: If your grief seems too overwhelming, seek for professional help (e.g. talk with your counsellor). Seeking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

p.s.: Please check out our PsyBites notice board (Outside Lecture Theatre)
for more information on "Coping with Grief".



For further reading, please visit:
Psychology Today - Grief
BBC - Bereavement
Helpguide.org - Support for Grieving and Bereavement

PsyBites!

Watch out for PsyBites! Because it bites!


p.s.: For more information, please check out Berjaya UCH notice board.

Stress?

Hey, guys.

How's your study and preparation for exam? Hope everyone of you is doing well. Strive for the best for your exam. It will pay off someday.

It may not be the first time you sit for an exam (the first time maybe was in kindergarten, right?). Yet, some of us still feel very nervous before going into exam hall and sit for our exam. You may still feel your heart pounding faster, dizzy, or stomach cramp. Underlying all these symptoms, it is stress.

Stress, is not necessary bad. Each one of us need some trials and positive stresses to help us grow, motivate us to do better. Imagine a life without stress... Everything would be peaceful, everything would not worry you anymore; you don't have to worry about your stress anymore. After a while, life would be absolutely boring.

One way to combat stress is to learn how to cope with it. There are so many alternatives which you can search for, by using Google. However, I always think the most important part is our attitude. Think positively, have faith in yourself, and take it as a challenge. If you need help, seek help from your family members, friends, and even from Dept. of Student Services :) why not?

We are all created in a way which we need to work and rest in our lives. To achieve the optimum level of happiness, we need to work diligently and rest well. (e.g. an example of resting more than enough is to sleep for 12 hours a day and feel dizzy and sick after you wake up.)

I know preparing for an exam is tough (I've been there too ^^, it'll be over after 1-2 week(s)
Yet, don't forget to: Eat Well, Sleep Well, Worry Less, and Try Your Best.

Last but not least,
A fun thing I suggest you to do~*
Check your stress level HERE: Cohen's Stress Scale

With Big Hug,
your college counselor
Coral

Overcome Shyness

When you were a kid, you may hide from strangers, those uncles and aunties you've never met before, and your mom forced you to call them 'uncle' or 'auntie'. You don't even know them. You may cry or throw tantrum. Your mom may say, "he/she's just a bit shy."



Well, after a while, you may feel like you still feel shy sometimes because deep inside you, you're trying to protect yourself.

Shyness is something you could overcome.
Learn more about it.

Find out about the causes, consequencse, how the loved one and psychologists could help
through this link.
Or download the brochure here (pdf file)

Other recommended sites:
Shake Your Shyness
by a clinical psychologist

and Shyness.com

What stopped us from wanting to know more?

As little children, we used to ask a lot of questions when we were young.
"Why is the sky blue?"
"Why this thing looks like this?"
"What is the man doing in the movie?"
"Why can't I eat this?"

Somehow, after being asked a lot of questions, adults may feel frustrated and try to avoid our questions.

Then, we learned not to ask too much questions, because adults always keep quiet. We thought we may look smarter if we kept quiet. It's true that no one would know if we did not know something, being silent may be a good way to hide our ignorance.

We were taught, "Don’t touch. Don’t climb. Don’t yell. Don’t take that apart. Don’t get dirty. Don’t. Don’t. Don’t." -these disapproval stopped us from wanting to know more because we are fear of being rejected (Perry, 2001).

Dr Perry also stated the 2 other elements which may affect our learning process when we were young (honestly, your life now is related to your childhood/past): Fear and Absence of care from parents/caretakers.

This is a very interesting chart taken from his article about learning process of children:

Curiosity	results in	Exploration
Exploration	results in	Discovery
Discovery	results in	Pleasure
Pleasure	results in	Repetition
Repetition	results in	Mastery
Mastery	results in	New Skills
New Skills	results in	Confidence
Confidence	results in	Self esteem
Self esteem	results in	Sense of Security
Security	results in	More Exploration

Please don't blame our parents or teachers for not giving enough chances for us to learn more and explore more. Forgive them as we may make the same mistake too.

The good news is we are still living, and there is always a chance to learn while you are still breathing. ^_^

Reading books is not the only way to learn.

I've found out that in WiseGeek, you can even...

Learn about what does 200 Calories look like.

A few examples:

Baby Carrots
570 grams = 200 Calories

Honeydew Melon
553 grams = 200 Calories

Coca Cola
496 ml = 200 Calories

Of course, you could find out more than this online...

Psychologies' How-to guide for personal growth

Want to learn to improve your life-skills in just a few easy steps?

I've found the online manual in Psychologies magazine website, which is quite helpful. You can check it out by clicking the banner above.

Learn about:
How to beat your exam nerves
How to spot a lie
How to be a good listener
How to win an argument
How to be lucky
How to turn your bad day into a good day,
etc, etc, etc...


If you prefer to watch a video and learn it in an interactive way, check out


It's free, and some of the videos are quite hilarious. You can even learn how to be a perfect girlfriend/boyfriend How to prevent credit card fraud, how can you make a good first impression, how to save money, etc, etc, etc...


eHow is a good website which provides you how-to step by step information. In the same time, their video section is also a good resource for self-improvement.

You can even learn how to attract consumers, how to tango, how to lose weight, how to cook, how to write a CV, etc, etc, etc...

Body Language: What you can't hide

Body language is essential in human communications.

It consists of 65%-90% in every conversation.

Just imagine, babies can't talk. How do they communicate?

They use body language: Cry

This lady is touching her leg, what does it mean?

Even dogs have body language too.

It's interesting, isn't it?

Find out more from next Wednesday talk (09.09.09)
5.30p.m. in Lecture Theater
Body Language: What you can't hide

Brought to you by Ms. Coral.
DoSS


Before you attend the talk, you may like to test how well you could read body language.
Try out this test: Can you spot fake smiles? BBC